Boo hiss

So a friend of mine starts tryna play matchmaker and tells me I should try Getting to know a guy friend of hers. Im hesitant but open to seeing what might could possibly happen seeing as how my feminine wiles are nonexistent * moment of silence for my game that never was*

Then she sends me a picture of dude.
*insert screeching halt* Im no longer sure if i should call this bum my friend any longer.

Man is 5'5" if that, balding, and just...no *side eye + grimace*

I call this 'friend' like
Heifa do you even know me?
Her response: I know you're fucking single!

Ha. Touché
Well played


Well played



I swear I'm not picky
However, I've got standards dammit



I'd like to have someone reasonable actually enter my vagina before I turn 30

I'd like to get those fluttering butterfly shits that y'all people claim y'all get
(except I wantem to be pterodactyls cause they're badass)

It's cold and snowing outside and I wanna burrow beneath bountiful man bosom er uh
Whatever
You know what I mean

*goes to see if Rick Ross is currently occupied*