Hairy Situation

i don't shave down there
not at all
it's not that hairy anyway
i mean what's the point
noone's gon see it

my legs are pretty much always covered up

puahahaha
okay
im bein an ass
This post is about hair a lil further up

no we're still not talkin bout the vajayjay
(altho, while we're on the subject, how many of yall have gotten it waxed? How was it?)

Back to the real intent of this friggin post

The hair on my damn head

I came into this world with a head full of hair


and it went downhill from there
(well until i decided to go natural but whatever. That comes later)

When i said i was practically bald in junior high
That is no friggin exaggeration
okay
only slight hyperbole
lol

Just to make you see how sad it was, I got excited when the back of my hair reached halfway neck length
oh man
pathetic
and my bangs that were not bangs
(fuckin bastards it's not a bang that's just how short my hair is)
Yo
when my bangs reached my eyebrows,
Tell me why i was hype??!??!?! SMH

Then in the summer before highschool i discovered weave
not the sew in kind
cuz i couldnt handle that one yet
but the ghetto bobby pin in a ponytail
you know the kind i'm talkin bout
The one where the tail don't match the rest of the damn horse



(i see yall givin me the face)
YEAH
THAT SAD
but you couldn't tell me NOTHIN
i thought i was stylin yall
Eventually i managed the art of actually making sure the weave matched my damn hair
I still don't understand how it was possible but i managed to wear the same exact weave throughout my sophmore year of highschool
(i washed it bastards)

Anyway my dumbass continued with the stupidity
Yall ladies know how yall supposed to perm between every 6-8 weeks or some crap like that?
Well apparently i aint get the memo
i saw some newgrowth and tried to tame it right quick

I really had no idea what i was doing and it showed
with my bald-headed ass

Then the lord commanded me to......
No
but i did come across a haircare site
Nappturality.com
and i did me some reading

From that edumacation i knew i'd have to start from scratch basically if i wanted to actually maintain some damn hair on my head

but i was fighting it
me? cut all my damn hair off??!?!?!?!!?
(yes i know
ur saying "Bitch you was already bald!! What's the problem??!?!!?!?")
Well almost-bald and bald are two different things
ask Donald Trump
You will work wit them last two strands and swear up and down ur cute
Well this aint the Simpsons and i aint Homer up in this bitch

I decided i'd go natural
(when i first decided to go natural it was just for the sake of growing my hair. I planned on perming it as soon as i saw me some length)
i let my hair be for three months than chopped off the permed ends

I went into the bathroom grabbed me some scissors and some conditioner and started
cutting before i could change my mind

Glad i did that

So here i am
goin on two years since i chopped
a year since i actually figured out what the hell i was doing
a few trims
3 cuts
and i can honestly say i don't plan on perming again
(i aint got nothing against yall permed sistahs,
or brothers *side eye*)

but this is what works for me
I for sure still am close friends with weave
What?
that's my buddy right there



but my afro is my numero uno road dawg

Say hi to the napps everybody









oh and say hi to the ole haitian immigrant
This is him when i first moved back to bk 2 1/2 years ago


This is him now
(in the middle of some bootleg mackin story again)

He tries to say the weight gain is because of the stress i caused him
Can somebody please tell his ole ass
he should be lucky i moved back in with him bcuz he was lookin a lil skeletorish
I saved his life dammit
he was damn near on his death bed before i came along